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Distracted....

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I used to be a pretty focused person, give me a task, and I would get it done. I also considered myself pretty good at multitasking, former teacher, first responder, owner of my own business for 14 years. I can do more than one thing at a time. I've got this. Or at least , I used to have it.

If you have been in the shop in the past 5 weeks you have met Carolina, my sweet new brown dog. She has me distracted. I NEED her to be my girl, I NEED her to be my shop dog. I NEED to have another living soul that needs me, so I have no choice but to get out from under the covers in the morning, put on my walking gear and get out there. We need to walk the beach and laugh at waves and then walk the neighborhood and learn to be a team. We NEED each other. We need to help each other learn to be brave. I NEED her to be my spontaneous laughter, and tears of joy and a reason to get up and go try to tackle another day.

For reasons I can't even begin to write here (read past blog posts if you don't know the back story of my past several months) I really NEED this sweet brown dog in my life. I've been asked " What is she in training for?" My answer is 'to be a really good yarn store dog'. She is learning how to be my girl, and I am learning how to be her person. And all of that takes a lot of work when the dog that adopted you had obviously been abused and had a hard start.

And, so I'm sometimes distracted at the shop. Sometimes REALLY distracted at the shop. I'm hustling to get new inventory ordered, hustling to get it out so you can get inspired, and then there is this *sometimes* nutty, barking brown dog who gets me all off center - and really distracted. And then I stop what I'm doing that is focused on the shop and I grab the treat jar and hope to convince you, dog person or not, to just be kind and patient with my sweet Carolina girl. And then that gets me off track, and the focus is dog and not yarn.... and then I have to get myself back on the track... (train, train,train, track, YARN!)

I need you guys, my people to know I'm still here for you. You guys and your projects and your ideas are still the reason I open the doors of the shop. But in the mix, there is this really sweet, kind of scared, sort of skittish brown dog. And I need her too. After a year of such profound loss and sadness, I NEED this sweet, shy, kind of scared brown dog to be my girl. I need to have her at the shop to remind me that we are BOTH learning to be brave and walk forward. We are survivors, and we can become our very best selves with each other and the help of good friends.

I know I'm a mess some days...and other days more than a mess. And if you were in the shop in the past couple years and I was in LaLa land because my everyday was unraveling at the edges, you have seen my mess. I am working really hard to get past that MESS.

I'm doing better, parts of my life are settling into a nice groove. My garden is growing, the first zinnias and hydrangeas were cut for display at the shop this week. My Little House brings me great joy and a huge sense of calm and peace and joy. And this sweet brown dog, with her beautiful face is another part of the joy that is helping me walk forward through the tough times behind me to find the joy in the now.

So, please forgive me if I'm a bit, or more, distracted trying to get my Carolina girl to settle and learn that most people are good and kind. Forgive me if I loose my train of thought mid sentence and jabber. Please forgive my Carolina girl for a bit of a grump or even for the full on 'I'm scared out of my skin' panicked barking. I need her, and she needs me, and we need you guys to keep loving us even if we are a bit distracted around the edges. Learning to be brave is hard work. Thanks for standing beside us as we figure it all out.

In sticks and hooks and string, and dog treats...

xoxo - j & C


 

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